Month: July 2016

Types of Malay wedding vendors

Planning a wedding function is an eventful journey, as all BTBs can attest to. The success of your event depends a lot on our kahwin vendors!

Our Malay community is so small here. Unlike our Chinese friends, we have no choice but to be kiasu and book years in advance. We don’t have the luxury of having a large pool to pick from. We can select vendors outside the community, but its a hassle to explain to them the intricacies and culture of the Malay wedding.

While communicating with our local kahwin vendors, I’ve come to realise that they are really a diverse bunch of people in the business. The following is the product of my experience so far.

Disclaimer: These are just for good humour and I apologise in advance if I upset any sensitive folks.
  1. The Popular

They ‘re the first names that comes to mind and for good reason. Established and the quality of their work speaks volumes. Ability to command a high price tag and has no need to run promotions or participate in wedding expos.

2. The Too Cool for You

A subset of the popular category. Everyone wants them so they can’t take in people not 100% committed to them. Please make an appointment only if you want to book with them okay? And no you cannot look through their products even when you signed up already and are at their office. Just be content with photos on their Facebook first and select what you want closer to your wedding date. You live by their terms, but its okay because they are popular for a reason… right??

3. The One who gets by through word of mouth

In this digital age, they’re the ones who have no social media presence or even email and rely through networks and word of mouth, which is a powerful tool. Need their services? Just pick up the phone and call them the old fashioned way. Usually family run businesses. If they are caterers, their food is usually super sedap, honed by years of experience.

4. The Unresponsive

Why you no reply me? 😦 I know you read my messages.. there’s 2 blue ticks!! Last time, when you trying to chase after me, so fast and attentive you respond but now when I have committed to you totally, you ignore me!

[Please don’t let our marriages be like this hahaha!]

5. The One who’s like trying to apply for a job

A simple email to request for a quote gets a 5 paragraph long response of their vision/mission/10 year plan before ending with the information that you really wanted in the first place – their packages.

6. The New Kid on the Block

The ones who just joined the industry and have limited business at the moment. Do give them your attention though.. take a leap of faith if you like what you see. And you may just be the one that propels them into the popular category. (Plus they are super affordable too).

7. The Pushy Stalkers

More annoying then the credit card salesmen at the MRT station, they are relentless. Great if you want to engage them, bad if not. Try to communicate via email at first contact and not give away your mobile numbers!

So that concludes what I’ve experienced so far. But what I’ve also realised is that its a supportive community that collaborates with each other and not overly compete for business.

Pick your vendors wisely!


Mas Kahwin

Over the Raya weekend, I was having lunch with the tunang’s family and his mum asked directly what I wanted for mas kahwin + hantaran gifts.

Seriously, I find such talks very awkward. If you state too much, we seem materialistic. But if you state too little, then also won’t have that wedding feel.

I always wanted a ring for mas kahwin, but the future MIL said my finger is too small for a proper ring (my engagement ring is a child-sized ring) so any rings would have to be customised. She suggested a necklace instead, but I don’t really fancy necklaces. I definitely do not want cash because I want a proper keepsake for sentimental value too.

Hehehe.. more particular about mahr because this is the physical wajib symbol of your marriage. But the mahr also cannot sound too weird when tok kadi speaks.. “Saya nikahkan bla bla bla dengan satu gelang Pandora..”

I think way too much about these things!